Past few weeks have been bit of a shocker, bit of disappointment, bit of sadness, bit of reality checks.
(Is that enough to explain my absense from blog world?)
Well - the sad phase started with my daughter falling ill and ofcourse me catching it there on. No idea what kind of virus it was this time that it took over 2 weeks for me to start feeling better. Besides terrible cough, running nose it was high fever and complete drain of energy. And after 3 weeks i am still coughing.
But thats not what bothered me as much.
Its the reality checks about people i know. I have already been in "O I have no friends" mood for few months now and to top it all came such shocks that i am not even sure how i want to react now. Friends (atleast i thought so) saying such things at my back that its almost impossible for me to believe they said so. More friends trying to be the well wisher and sweet pal behaving such-a-boss and putting me down at the first instance possible. The know-it-all Friends. The well-wisher friends. The O-I-am-so-rich friends. The O-I-am-the-best friends. And the list goes on...
I am completely disappointed by this relationship called "friendship". Its always their selfish self which takes priority. Its always the money which stays on top. The What-can-you-do-for-me - remains the main agenda.
People trying to prove how stupid others are.
I feel so saddened. I want to move away from all such souls. But I am unable to do so. Some people have too strong a personality to let you move away. I feel caught. I feel trapped.
I might perhaps get over this in sometime or rather get used to it but i will continue to be disappointed. I will continue to feel sad. I will continue to feel cheated. And i will continue to feel the pain of being stabbed in the back.
(Is that enough to explain my absense from blog world?)
Well - the sad phase started with my daughter falling ill and ofcourse me catching it there on. No idea what kind of virus it was this time that it took over 2 weeks for me to start feeling better. Besides terrible cough, running nose it was high fever and complete drain of energy. And after 3 weeks i am still coughing.
But thats not what bothered me as much.
Its the reality checks about people i know. I have already been in "O I have no friends" mood for few months now and to top it all came such shocks that i am not even sure how i want to react now. Friends (atleast i thought so) saying such things at my back that its almost impossible for me to believe they said so. More friends trying to be the well wisher and sweet pal behaving such-a-boss and putting me down at the first instance possible. The know-it-all Friends. The well-wisher friends. The O-I-am-so-rich friends. The O-I-am-the-best friends. And the list goes on...
I am completely disappointed by this relationship called "friendship". Its always their selfish self which takes priority. Its always the money which stays on top. The What-can-you-do-for-me - remains the main agenda.
People trying to prove how stupid others are.
I feel so saddened. I want to move away from all such souls. But I am unable to do so. Some people have too strong a personality to let you move away. I feel caught. I feel trapped.
I might perhaps get over this in sometime or rather get used to it but i will continue to be disappointed. I will continue to feel sad. I will continue to feel cheated. And i will continue to feel the pain of being stabbed in the back.
Yeah, sometimes friends reek... but I would suggest some optimism and broader perspective in such situations. You definitely can't control people's behaviour but that doesn't mean you can't control their behaviour towards you..(wow, i can put deep thots too...). Well, enough of dat gyan, least to say your blog is really nice! Wud luv to hear more frm you!
ReplyDeleteHugss B! And just move on from such people - I don't think u need to feel sad and cheated; they do teach us lessons as to whom we should not be with. Take care!
ReplyDeleteHi, it's coincidental that i wanted to check your blog to see what's going on and i saw this. I would say move on but not from people but from considering them as friends, demote them as acquaintances, i am sure you feel a lot better, less the expectations are, less the hurt. Besides, there are friends who care about you, not alone by any means.
ReplyDeleteHave a cheerful weekend and the rest of the year.