You don’t feel like getting up. You don’t feel like taking shower. You start getting pains in shoulder, back and head. You lie down on couch for hours. Doing nothing. And you tell yourself- “oh you can do this sometimes, its Ok to do nothing sometimes.”
But then this becomes normal and repeated feeling. And suddenly one day you start recognizing this. A feeling of deja-vu! This has happened before.
You pick up the signs. Do you want to go back to the same place again? The dark lonely place. The place which keeps dragging you down and puts the blame on physical issues like pains and aches. The place where tears roll down without warning. The place where outsiders are not allowed. The place which only keeps getting darker.
But then this becomes normal and repeated feeling. And suddenly one day you start recognizing this. A feeling of deja-vu! This has happened before.
You pick up the signs. Do you want to go back to the same place again? The dark lonely place. The place which keeps dragging you down and puts the blame on physical issues like pains and aches. The place where tears roll down without warning. The place where outsiders are not allowed. The place which only keeps getting darker.
No no no no!
You remind yourself of that phase. You cannot go back to that. Noone would be able to bring you back if you go there again. You do not even have those saviors around anymore. A lot of realization comes along with this thought. Get up. Keep going. Don’t give power to that darkness to pull you down.
~A reminder for self in times like this.
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